This guitar belongs to the guy who claimed he was turned into a vampire after he signed what he thought was a joke contract with a lady who actually turned out to be a demon!!!  She tricked him!!!  Now he was really a vampire because the contract was REAL!!!  (Also, “joke contracts” are not a thing.  Sure, neither are vampires and demons, but I’m willing to let those go because the concept of a “joke contract” is by far the dumbest and least believable part of his story.)

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I'm Maggie. I'm often comically pissed off about things, I am petty and immature, and I have many tribal tattoos from the 90s for which I refuse to be apologetic. I used to be the singer of a band you never heard of in South Florida and have had the misfortune of dating many musicians. I have a book coming out later this winter, because who doesn't.

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